4dp2dt, Otherwise Known As I'm Bringing the Caftan Back
So...
Yeah...
Um, I'm here. Hanging out. Trying to relax. It's a bit hard when there are two teenagers in the house (Aidan's visiting daughter and her best friend) who somehow ALWAYS manage to find the 24-hour "All Beyonce" channel, which has to be played at volumes that people in Belgium can hear. This, and I can't. Fucking. Stand. Beyonce (and that whole Destiny's Child thing, I hate them too, I'm not picky.)
I'm also going to disable my iDeck soon, too, because if they keep slapping their iPod nanos on there and playing Guns and Roses I'm going to have to check in to a mental facility. That's right-GUNS AND ROSES. Fucking Sweet Child of Mine has played 1,000 times. I didn't like that song when I was in puberty, I sure don't like it now (and how embarrasing that was- the song came on while I was cooking dinner. "Oh," says ignorant I, "I remember this song from when I was a teen." "Yeah," comes the teenage reply. "It's totally an old song." I just kept stirring and internally remonstrated myself for wanting to retort with "Bite me.")
You might be able to tell the progesterone is really affecting my mood.
If you can't tell, well...lemme' just say this-GODDAMN IT I'M ANGRY ALOT.
That and annoyed with the waxy bullets in general-they're not fun to put in (now why do you think the instructions feel they need to mention to wash one's hands after insertion? Huh? Why? I'm supposed to stick these things one inch up my rectal passage and they think the idea of washing my hands hasn't occurred to me? Really? Just the fact alone that my finger has been up my ass makes me want to take a flame thrower to my digits, let alone wash them off. My hands are now so chapped from washing I could use them to loofah the soles of my feet.) The pessaries leak a bit which is ultimately humiliating. They also give me wind that gives the dog a run for his money, and when I let one go he and I both look confused as to where that sound came from...and then we hurriedly leave the room.
Things are ongoing. As far as how I'm doing, I can tell you my breasts are so sore I'm thinking of resorting to wearing a caftan. I'm bringing the caftan back. The caftan will absolutely make my girls feel better. I know the boobs is a symptom of the progesterone, I had them before the transfer even, but it makes wearing a bra practically unbearable (so whip 'em off ladies! Screw the establishment!)
I have a lot of uterine cramps and twinges, but that could be just because a whole lot of activity has been going on in the party known as my reproductive organs. I threw out half of my smoked salmon this morning because I thought it tasted funny, but then maybe it did taste funny (although Aidan says his was fine.) I have heatburn, but I'm stressed about a lot of things and my ulcer went off anyway. In short, I have no idea how I'm doing.
I can tell you I pathologically hate Beyonce's music, does that help?
I don't think that's a symptom of pregnancy...
Bea
Posted by: Bea | 11 February 2007 at 12:10 PM
Oh! But it's not a symptom of unpregnancy either.
Bea
Posted by: Bea | 11 February 2007 at 12:11 PM
Are you sure? I thought I remembered reading "tearing hair out over Beyonce and threatening to wipe out small villages if exposed to the music" being a symptom.
I must be wrong about that.
Posted by: Vanessa | 11 February 2007 at 12:13 PM
Whoa. The progesterone is to be inserted, ummm, there??? Wow. Thankfully, I've only had to do the ol' insert vaginally. Eee gads. No wonder you are in a foul mood.
Posted by: Ali | 11 February 2007 at 01:32 PM
Perhaps you forgot to wash your hands before eating the salmon and that's why it tasted a little funny.
Posted by: Anita | 11 February 2007 at 02:11 PM
Another reason why I'm so glad I got a needle in the ass.
Except I can't ricochet PIO...
Posted by: statia | 11 February 2007 at 05:11 PM
I laughed like a drain at you and the dog slinking off!! Fingers (free from bottom action!) crossed for you.
Posted by: andi | 11 February 2007 at 06:05 PM
Oh, amen on Beyonce. If I hear "Irreplaceable" one more time I'm going to rip her weave out myself.
Posted by: ilyka | 11 February 2007 at 08:30 PM
Holy crap, Beyonce channel? Ack- that's just another word for hell...
You crack me up :)
Posted by: Meri-ann | 11 February 2007 at 08:59 PM
Guns & Roses and Beyonce... Oh, I hear your pain. Why the progesterone up there? Here it is vaginal only. For your sore boobs, I recommend sports bra like the "simple racerback bra" from The Gap. I even slept in them b/c my boobs hurt too much with all that freaking progesterone. Take care of yourself, and bonne chance with everything
Posted by: Marie Baguette | 12 February 2007 at 12:17 AM
Dear Vanessa, this was too funny. I had to read the bit about the rectal pessaries to my husband as I was laughing too hard. Yes, some instructions are really superfluous...
Posted by: Kath | 12 February 2007 at 02:59 AM
Thanks for the laugh, I'm sure you widh you could join me.
But I'm all about the braless caftan.
Posted by: caltechgirl | 12 February 2007 at 03:44 AM
I enjoyed the little chuckle..xx
Posted by: shazz | 12 February 2007 at 05:59 AM
You mean you didn't stay up late and watch the Grammy's with Beyonce, Carrie Underwood, et al? Oh come on you are missing out!!! :-)
Posted by: Jen m | 12 February 2007 at 11:59 AM
It must be said that in my head I just heard Justin Timberlake singing "I'm bringing caftans back (yeah!)," so thanks for making me laugh out loud at my desk.
Posted by: amy t. | 12 February 2007 at 02:14 PM
I have to admit that Sweet Child of Mine brings back good memories for me... but I do agree about Beyonce - with or without progesterone, she's too much.
I can't believe you have to put your progesterone up there. That is just WRONG! You poor thing!
Posted by: hopefulmother | 12 February 2007 at 06:14 PM
Hmmm . . . looking for the silver lining . . . at least they are distracting you??
Hang in there!
Posted by: beagle | 13 February 2007 at 01:37 PM