Kafka Dreams

I've always had what I call Kafka Dreams, which is a nickname for a very special kind of fun called a night terror.  My Kafka Dreams come and go, but I always have them and I suspect they'll always be around.

Last night I had one.

For the first time, it was one about the babies.

And I'll tell you about it, because hearing about other people's dreams is never boring or anything.

In brief-I gave birth to the twins.  One boy, one girl.  And while I was waiting in another room for someone to tell me the boy had been born and was ok (I realize there's something amiss with that scenario, like I would probably be in the same room as the birthing, but then you never really know) they brought our daughter in.

She was beautiful.

And when I unswaddled her, I saw she didn't have any legs, she just had two E.T. like feet on the bottom of her body.

Our daughter had no legs.

And I started screaming and Aidan took the baby and was fantastic with her and loved her to bits and rocked her, and then his kids showed up and were fantastic about her and waited for her brother, and all I could do was scream about the E.T. feet on our child.

I woke up badly.

If I had a baby with no legs, just E.T. feet, I know I would love it forever.  And I've seen the legs on both the babies in the scans, they look like little froggy legs with their bent knees.

Still, it's my first baby-related anxiety dream.  I know I'm not alone, I am sure loads of pregnant women have them (Carol I know has been there) but I can tell you-not fun.  You wake up feeling horrible.

Especially since I'm sure there won't be a sequel to E.T.

Comments

[Kath]

Ugh, Vanessa, how disturbing! I hope you are spared Kafka dreams for the rest of your pregnancy.

[Anita]

How I hate the dreams. In mine I am never pregnant but Sgt is always leaving me.
One dream he left because he said he never really loved me, another he left me for another man. Each time I wake up in a cold sweat barely able to breath.
Stupid dreams.

[caltechgirl]

what a terrible dream. Whenever I have a bad dream like that it sticks with me for quite a while. Here's hoping you can shake it off and focus on happy lemonheads instead.

I know you'll love whoever they turn out to be. You'll be great with them. I just know it.

[Margi]

My momma always called dreams "Data Dumps."

Just a random data dump.

And mommies always have dreams like this. Mine was that I put the baby on top of the car while I loaded groceries and then forgot and drove off with him up there.

Yeah. Like I'd ever do THAT.

(I mean, I did it with my coffee cup, once. ONCE. And boy it evidently scarred me for life.)

[Carol]

these dreams are just awful.

The only way I found to console myself was to remind myself that I have had lots of dreams that didn't come true - like dreams about breastfeeding cats for example.

Hope yours doesn't haunt you as long as mine did though - it took days for me to shake it.

[Lut C.]

What a disturbing dream.

[caba]

I had some pretty freakish dreams when I was pregnant with my twins. I had read in a lot of books that it a normal and common part of pregnancy. Kind of odd, but they, so many weird things are happening to our bodies during pregnancy, why not crazy dreams too?? I know it's hard sometimes to shake it after you wake up, just realize it's normal. Good luck!